I Breathe, Therefore I Blog

I have to wonder if after all this time that anyone will read this, but I do want to let everyone know that I am still alive and doing ok.

A lot has happened since my last post, and I don't really think that I have time to recount it all, so I will hit the highlights:

I am soon to be single. Cheryl and I have agreed to terms, and we are going lawyerless to dissolution. It should have happened sooner, but her and I have just been lazy about it.

Last October I was fired for the first time in my life. I blame my inability to separate my personal life from my work life... lesson learned.

For the following 6 months, I earned an obscene amount of money working in a Steel mill as a replacement worker... aka SCAB

Currently I am working as FAE, I love it. (Field Applications Engineer)

I am doing well... trust me when I say that. I am happier than I have been in a long time.

I would love to hear from my friends in Cyber-Space, so please say hi.

Bye for now,

Rick

Hi.... I'm Rick... Remember Me?

I've been away for a while trying to get my life back in order. Much of this has involved therapy and medication. My daughter and sons have not been handling the fallout between me and their mom very well. Katie has lost her way and has been getting into significant trouble. David has been troubled, but not as badly. Tom seems to be okay, but I know he's been troubled too.

It's so surreal to see your worst fears realized; everything you work so hard to avoid happening. And the ones you try to protect the most wind up getting hurt more than you do - and all they do is sit there and want you to love them. They begin to question the very things you taught them to be absolute. They see cracks in the foundation of their lives.

And it all happens arbitrarily... I just feel as if I was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

The worst thing about all of it is that is could have been avoided.

I'll be back... just not sure when

Rick

The Year in Review

I realized that I have had this new blog here for a year now. So, it’s not so new anymore. Yesterday I had one of those days where there was not much to do, so I went through and read through the past year of entries. When I was done something occurred to me: “Wow… I’m a pretty depressed person.” The phrase ‘I’ve been pretty depressed’ occurs frequently.

The point is that it has been more than a year since the bottom fell out with my wife, and I just now saw the toll it took on me. Part of the reason why I’ve not been updating is because I’ve really been trying to focus on getting my act together. I’ve been diving into my job, and projects that I have going at home. I’ve been trying to take better care of myself. I’ve been taking two steps forward and one step back at times, but I think I’m heading in the right direction. The other reason is like I said in my last post…. I’m just tired of talking about the state of my marriage.

It’s time to focus on the positive things in my life… and there are plenty of them.

About Time I Updated...

When I was a kid, I lived in Bay Village, Ohio. I moved away when I was 14 to neighboring Westlake(August 1978). When I was 12, The Patrick family moved in across the street from us. As I remember there were 5 kids, Robbie, a girl whose name I can’t remember, Lewis, and the twins Ritchie and Cheri.

I was somewhat friends with them, and hung out at times with Lewis even though he was running with a different crowd than I was. I remember Robbie coming home from college at times, and that he had a really nice car that he spent lot of time on. I didn’t really know him well. Cheri was perhaps the sweetest little girl I had ever met in my life. She was always very nice to me, and I liked her.

Ritchie, on the other hand was perhaps the most annoying kid. He really got on my nerves. I remember I had a mini-bike that my dad had given me, and I was trying with as much of the mechanical acumen I had at the time to get it working… to no avail. Ritchie was there for a lot of the time while I was screwing with it, and he was constantly nagging and telling me that “I would never get it working.” Somewhere between the frustration of not getting it going and his constant badgering; I lost it. I pushed him down, and gave him a few swift kicks in his backside, and screamed at him to go home. Of course the neighbor lady across the street saw it, and started yelling at me. Embarrassed and angry, I pulled everything back into the garage, and slammed the door down. Ritchie, who is a few years younger than me, started bawling, and ran home.

The next thing I know his brother Lewis is at my door asking what happened, I went outside and explained; he was not satisfied, and pushed me around a little bit on behalf of his little brother. I had it coming.

The day I moved was the last I saw of them, I really wasn’t that close to them, and after the incident with Ritchie I was fairly sure that I would not talk to them again.

Yesterday I was looking at the website for the City of Bay Village getting information on the upcoming ‘Bay Day’ on the 4th of July since I’m planning on going. There I saw a link that listed famous people from Bay Village.

My jaw hit the floor. Guess who I used to live across the street from?


Robert Patrick


Ritchie Patrick

Robert, as most of you may know played the T1000 Terminator in T2 with 'Ah'nold, and Ritchie, or Richard as he goes now is the lead guitarist/vocalist for the band Filter. He also worked with Nine Inch Nails.

On the off chance that Ritchie should happen across this meager blog here in Cyber Space... hey, I'm really sorry about that thing with the mini-bike. I was way out of line. And I'm glad to see that you are still a Star Wars nerd. Tell Cheri and Lew I said hey.

So, where have I been? I’ve been busy doing a number of things really; mostly just to help me keep my sanity.

Cheryl, who has repeatedly quit drinking, has actually gone 10 days without it. Last month she asked me for more time. She felt that I was rushing her into a divorce. I really don’t see how since she has been asking for one on and off for the last 8 years. Since I really don’t have the time or resources right now to pursue this, I thought, “okay, I can wait”, and I have been watching her try to get some traction in life ever since.

You know, part of the reason I don’t update as regular as I like is because I really wish I had something else to talk about in my life other than the misery that is my wife.

Well, actually I do. There are other things that have been going on, but nothing really that exciting.

The big thing has been my garage project. For the last 2 years it has been an abysmal mess. The boys have been using as a hang out for playing ping pong. So for the last month I have been getting it cleaned out and made into a workshop for the projects I have coming. I have 2, one major; the other not so major, just a lot of work. The major one is going to be the demolition and reconstruction of a portion of my house, and the other is restoring an antique that I have had for the last 20 years. Both of these are stories in and of the themselves.

Perhaps I'll update later with the details of those projects.

Later, Rick

scary stuff - from Canada.com

My apologies... I was later informed that this post (albeit ages ago) was based on false infomation. Iran is not making Jews wear tags. It makes you wonder though.... if anyone is Jewish... why on earth would they want to live in IRAN???